Faith never knows where it is being led,
But it knows and loves the One who is leading.

I will praise the Lord at all times.

I will constantly speak his praises.

I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart.

Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together.

I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me.  He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.  In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; he saved me from all my troubles. For the angel of the Lord is a guard; he surrounds and defends all who fear him.

Taste and see that the Lord is good.  Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him! Fear the Lord, you his godly people, for those who fear him will have all they need. Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing.

Come, my children, and listen to me, and I will teach you to fear the Lord. Does anyone want to live a life that is long and prosperous? Then keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies! Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it.

The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right; his ears are open to their cries for help. But the Lord turns his face against those who do evil; he will erase their memory from the earth.

The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time. For the Lord protects the bones of the righteous; not one of them is broken!

Calamity will surely overtake the wicked, and those who hate the righteous will be punished. But the Lord will redeem those who serve him. No one who takes refuge in him will be condemned.

Psalm 34, New Living Translation

A friend sent me this link and it brought so much encouragement to me on a day when I really needed it. As I considered me and Mark’s relationship with Sam, I was reminded what a wonderful thing it is that I have an awesome heavenly Father who loves me so much it is difficult to fathom. I think I just needed to be reminded of these scriptures and truths presented here. Perhaps you are going through a storm too? You’ll want to watch this video. (Click on “Play 001 Rain Film” when you open the page).

I’m casting my cares aside
I’m leaving my past behind
I’m setting my heart and mind on You, Jesus

I’m reaching my hand to Your’s
Believing there’s so much more
Knowing that all you have in store for me is good, is good

Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won’t worry about tomorrow
I’m trusting in what You say
Today is the day

I’m putting my fears aside
I’m leaving my doubts behind
I’m giving my hopes and dreams to You, Jesus

I’m reaching my hand to Your’s
Believing there’s so much more
Knowing that all you have in store for me is good, is good

Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won’t worry about tomorrow
I’m trusting in what You say
Today is the day

I will stand upon Your truth
(I will stand upon Your truth)
And all my days I’ll live for You
(And all my days I’ll live for You)

Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won’t worry about tomorrow
I’m giving You my fears and sorrows
Where You lead me I will follow
I’m trusting in what You say
Today is the day

Lincoln Brewster, “Today Is The Day”

This past Saturday we experienced something quite beautiful. Our friend Julia gathered 20 friends and their children to come over for a time of fellowship, Mexican potluck and prayer. After we ate, the children played in the back yard while the adults stayed inside to pray. They laid hands on Mark and Noah, anointed us with oil, and poured out their hearts to God on our behalf.

We’re still making slow progress with Noah, and some days are still very hard. Satan, that liar and deceiver, has been trying to attack our hearts in three areas: one, that we’re isolated (e.g., we’re in this alone, no one really cares, no one understands, people are getting sick of helping you because this has gone on for so long); two, we should stop praying (e.g., why bother to pray, it’s obvious it isn’t helping, Noah’s still not eating, and you’re really not at the top of God’s to do list anyway); and third, that God’s character is on trial (e.g., can God really be good? if He was you’d be out of this situation by now, He’s not good and He must not love you or care about you very much).

As our friends prayed, the amazing thing to witness was that the Holy Spirit laid on their hearts to specifically pray against these lies. The very fact that there were 20+ people praying in our home showed us that we’re not alone and there are kind and faithful friends committed to seeking God on our behalf, willing to be a phone call away to stop and pray with us if needed. And of course satan doesn’t want us to pray—he knows the power of prayer and is happy to make us believe we’re defeated instead of us knowing we have victory in Jesus. So we continue to ask, seek and knock, and cry out to Him, for where we are weak He is strong! They also prayed that we would “taste and see that the Lord is good,” that He is working on our behalf, cares for us, and is meeting our needs… “I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness while I am here in the land of the living. Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord” (Ps. 27:13-14).

In between friends praying, some would read a portion of Scripture or offer an encouraging word. We prayed that satan would not rob us of our joy, for the joy of the Lord is our strength! And we need His joy and strength to continue to run this race. It was really an incredible time—we felt so encouraged and refreshed afterwards, like we had wind in our sails again. We’ve even been able to proclaim “God is good!” in the midst of bad reflux episodes. There were a few people who showed up that we had never even met before! Yet here they were to pray for our family. It just goes to show you how deep that bond in the Lord is between brothers and sisters in Christ. So now we have new friends, too! We are humbled, we are blessed, and we have seen His love poured out through His saints this past weekend. Many heartfelt and sincere thanks to those of you who came and blessed us as you did. We will remember this always.

A couple rough days this last week have brought me to my knees. I am so weary and know that I can’t endure this alone (course that’s just where He wants me, no)? For His power is perfect in weakness. And let me tell ya, I’m pretty weak. But I was introduced to a new hymn a few weeks ago that I really enjoy, especially the last verse. I’m just excited to be Home someday!

Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!
That calls me from a world of care,
And bids me at my Father’s throne
Make all my wants and wishes known.
In seasons of distress and grief,
My soul has often found relief
And oft escaped the tempter’s snare
By thy return, sweet hour of prayer!

Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!
The joys I feel, the bliss I share,
Of those whose anxious spirits burn
With strong desires for thy return!
With such I hasten to the place
Where God my Savior shows His face,
And gladly take my station there,
And wait for thee, sweet hour of prayer!

Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!
Thy wings shall my petition bear
To Him whose truth and faithfulness
Engage the waiting soul to bless.
And since He bids me seek His face,
Believe His Word and trust His grace,
I’ll cast on Him my every care,
And wait for thee, sweet hour of prayer!

Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!
May I thy consolation share,
Till, from Mount Pisgah’s lofty height,
I view my home and take my flight:
This robe of flesh I’ll drop and rise
To seize the everlasting prize;
And shout, while passing through the air,
“Farewell, farewell, sweet hour of prayer!”

The following is from a blog I read from a Pastor’s wife in town. Considering our present trial with a child who cannot eat on his own and the difficulties that presents each day, I found it sobering and encouraging. I just had to post it for our readers, too:

Are there situations in your life that seems irreconcilable? Is there a circumstance that continually chafes? Is the Lord taking you through a trial that appears to have no end? Does it sometimes feel easier just to despair than to trust?

I was thinking and praying through my own responses to these questions today. As I pleaded with the Lord to change circumstance, people, relationships, I sensed my hardening of heart as I could not see, through Ruth-colored lenses, any resolution or reprieve within reach. The sclerosis gave way to humility as the Lord reminded me that He never promised to spare us from the valley of the shadow of death, but rather that we may walk through it with Him.

Details do not matter here…the Apostle Paul never told us what his thorn was, instead he simply encouraged:

So to keep me from being too elated by the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messeger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from being too elated. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships,

persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10, ESV)

Therein lies the resolution, the reprieve, the response: That I may rejoice all the more in hurt and trials, that my God might be made more beautiful in my life and undeniably sufficient in the face of the seemingly insurmountable.

Renée has likened our experience over the past month to that of a roller coaster ride: up one day and down another. This past Thursday and Friday have held one of those humps.

Thursday morning started with an ultrasound of Noah’s head to check for any abnormalities, just as a precaution, since he has yet to master the coordination between breathing, sucking, and swallowing, making it very difficult for him to eat. Thankfully, the ultrasound came back completely normal, showing no abnormalities. We as his parents were able to breathe a sigh of relief… for a moment.

Early Thursday afternoon, Renée received a call from the hospital asking for both her and I to be available for a consultation. Renée wanted to know what the need was, and the nurse explained that she and several other nurses had reason to think that Noah showed signs of Down’s, cerebral palsy, or other disorder, and that one (or more) of these was to explain his slowness in learning to eat. They wanted to have a geneticist come by to examine Noah and run some tests to make sure everything was okay.

Of course, this sent Renée and I into hysterics. Despite the nurses trying to console us by noting that the tests were only precautionary, every single possibility ran through our head of what could be wrong. It’s difficult when the suggestion is made to simply discount it and put it out of our heads.

Needless to say, we didn’t sleep exceptionally Thursday night. Since we’re still slightly sick with colds, Renée’s mom and my dad went to the hospital when the geneticist came by Friday afternoon to examine Noah.

An older gentleman, the geneticist is very well-respected in his field and is nationally-renowned. After his 40-minute examination of Noah, he turned to talk to my father and mother-in-law. He explained that from his examination of Noah, there were over 350 diagnoses that he could completely rule out. He concluded that everything about Noah was completely normal and there was nothing noteworthy at all to even warrant further testing. He mentioned that his jaw was perhaps slightly underdeveloped and that his tongue was slightly large, but anyone who knows me and Renée know that those traits are inherited (bless his heart, poor kid). Those two things may be reason enough for his difficulties in eating, but just require time and more practice to get better.

What an answer to prayer! All of my family felt as though a gigantic burden had been lifted from our shoulders. We are so thankful that God is continuing to protect our little boy and grow him up. He IS drawing us to our knees to show us that He is in control.

Frankly, this is really, really hard. Every single day is a struggle. But like I mentioned before, God is carrying us through everything.

On another note, since Renée turns 30 on Saturday (happy birthday, sweetheart), I thought it would only be fitting to surprise her with something she’d never expect. Thursday night, her best friend Tiffany flew in from Houston and walked through the front door to surprise Renée with a much needed hug and much-needed company; she’s here with us until Sunday. Actually planned since early December, her visit comes at an opportune time to help us with everything.

Please everyone continue to appeal to our Father for His help in our time of need. We continue to appreciate all the support we’ve received from family and friends!