Psalm 91:1-2 — He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”

I just couldn’t continue praying.  Words didn’t matter any more.  There was nothing that could be said, except, “Thanks.”

This came after our normal Bible time with Samuel.  Every night before Sammy’s bedtime, all three of us get together on the couch.  I read a chapter of Scripture and then we go around and repeat one thing that stood out to us as we listened to God’s Word.  (There’s the extra caveat that you have to remember something unique—so if it’s already been said, you better have something else!)  We go from youngest to oldest, with me as the reader last.  Samuel is always very happy to point to the picture of Jesus on the wall; Renée and I then discuss the things we remember.

Afterwards, we often sing a song or two, but then we always pray.  We thank the Lord for the blessings of the day and pray through our struggles.  We lift up our friends and family and trust God with our issues.  It’s a very relaxing and peaceful time to lay our burdens before the King and acknowledge His place in our lives.

Normally, Samuel sits still on my lap with his blanket over him while I pray.  But tonight, for whatever reason, he wanted to sit next to Mom.  I’m only a moment into our prayer—head slightly bowed, eyes closed—when I suddenly feel a pair of little lips upon mine.  I open my eyes and see Sammy smiling at me, only an inch from my face.  I thank him and we continue praying.  I keep one eye open and see him lean over and give Momma a kiss.  She thanks him too, and we continue praying, eyes closed.  (At least, Renée and I had our eyes closed.)

Suddenly, I feel a hand on my cheek push me in—and my lips meet my wonderful wife’s.  Sammy had also pushed in her face to mine!  We both giggled a little bit and pulled apart, only to be immediately pushed back together by Sammy, who had a huge smile on his face.  Again, we embrace then pull apart…

…only to be brought together by Sammy yet again!

This continued for several more kisses, and then we stopped praying with a hearty, “Amen”.  It was so sweet to have our little boy kiss us, but it was even sweeter to see him delight in Renée and I kissing.  So, we did indeed say, “Thanks,” both to our little cutie-pie, and to our own Dad.

Our first ultrasound for baby #2, at 12 weeks, went great. Our 18-week ultrasound was awful (mainly because the woman who did it was so incredibly rude I almost left the office crying). My sweet OB took pity on us and sent us elsewhere for a third ultrasound, at a completely different office this time. We prayed and asked the Lord to give us a sweet technician who’d let us see our baby’s face, and boy did He bless us with answered prayer!

Today we had our third ultrasound (at 23 weeks) for baby #2. The lady who did it was sooo nice. She gave us eighteen pictures of our little sweetheart, instead of the usual four, and four movies too! The baby weighs 1 lb. 5 oz., is about a foot long, and is measuring right on track at 23 weeks (except for its belly, which is measuring 25 weeks). We are pretty sure this is because baby #2 takes after it’s grand-dads! Haha. Everything looks really great and healthy, praise the Lord. We definitely have another wiggle worm on our hands though… the baby was moving so much we had a bit of a hard time seeing its face, and it got the hiccups the same time that Samuel did! (Sammy and Daddy got to see the baby on the big screen too)! That was pretty entertaining to hear and feel.

When we got home, we compared Samuel’s 21-week sonogram with Baby #2’s 23 week sonogram. We are completely amazed at how much they look alike! See for yourself. Here’s Samuel:

Here’s Baby #2:

Another one of Baby #2, and his/her foot:

(Just so you know, the black spots you see in the pics are not holes/dents in the baby, but shadows from the baby’s arm on its face). We are so thankful to Jesus for a great appointment and a healthy baby. We can hardly wait to hold our little angel in our arms! And Sammy’s been kissing the baby in Mommy’s belly a whole lot lately, so he’s pretty excited too!

Well, it came and went. July 29th was my due date for my second pregnancy, and I had been dreading it a little bit. I was hoping not to be sad all day, and thankful that when the day came I wasn’t. There were reminders all around of the Lord’s goodness, and with other family celebrations going on I didn’t have much time to think about it. It’s strange to imagine that if everything had functioned correctly there’d be a little baby around here right now.

Today was my 11 week OB appointment, of which I was also dreading. I felt fearful all day that we wouldn’t be able to find a heart beat, or something else would be wrong. Thankfully I had a bunch of sweet friends and family members praying for me… praying that I wouldn’t have a spirit of fear (which is not from God), but peace. Yet again, I need constant reminders of His Word and to moment by moment trust in Him. That probably won’t change with all the things there are to worry about when I’m a mother! My doctor’s appointment went well. We heard the heart beat and the baby is in the right place this time. We are so thankful and joyful and praising God for this good news!

Scott was over for dinner the other night (and to hang out with Samuel), and we were all getting ready to sit down to pizza when I chided Renée for preempting everyone and digging in, without praying. (Of course, I was just giving her a hard time since she’s pregnant and food pretty much rules her life at this stage of things.) Scott played the good guy and encouraged Renée, mentioning that praying before meals is really just a tradition of man, not “gospel.”

This was a good reminder to me of things that I’ve been trying to grasp lately. I’ve been rereading Don Miller’s “Searching For God Knows What”, and it’s been intriguing how much he advocates the idea of a relationship with Jesus, versus simply obeying rules. For some reason, with God, my human tendency is to always try and simplify things down into that common set of rules, of do’s and do not’s, when in reality, it should be more like the rest of my friendships. I long to speak and listen more naturally to Jesus, as I would Renée or any good friend.

I think I’m still trying to break old habits that I learned as a child. You see, when you’re a child, you really don’t have any idea of the importance of relationships. In fact, sometimes I think that ignorance was bliss: you’re friends with someone because you like doing the same things together. You explore together, ride bikes, play together, and all the while bonds of friendship form that can last a lifetime.

Why is it, however, that every time I mess up or sin, I feel like God is no longer going to be my friend? Why do I feel like the relationship is done for? That’s not even how human relationships work (well, the healthy ones), and this is the Lord, who is infinitely greater than us. I want my relationship with Christ to be similar in appearance to my other relationships, but of course as deep as the Lord can take me where I’m am at. I’d love, in the simple things I do, to talk with and work with Christ as if He’s right next to me.

I think it’s only when I start living in this way, and treating my relationship with Jesus so, that my life can be radically changed. For if I’m investing so much in doing this, I’m going to start seeing things the way Christ does (for I cannot but help to be influenced by Jesus) and have him help me change my life.  I can become secure in my identity as God’s child and start living purposefully without focused concern for my own wellbeing.

So after I chided Renée, I apologized by taking away all her food (just kidding).  Now we’re going to try to take a little bit more relational approach to our prayer times.  And I’ll just keep getting her all the donuts and pizza she wants.

There are a few other weblogs I check out every day… mostly other women from around the country, writing about their delights (the Lord, their husband and children, and other simple joys of life). This week I came across a lovely quote on one of their pages. The more I read over it and ponder it, the more I love it. So I thought I would share it with you:

“Stay at home my heart and rest, homekeeping hearts are happiest.” ~ Longfellow

I feel like this is ringing true in my heart more with each passing year. Keeping my house as a delightful and comfortable haven for my family and friends, where things are in order, towels and sheets are clean, a good meal is baking in the oven… is somehow more enjoyable with passing time. Not that it’s perfect. I don’t want a perfect place, but a place where we can relax because work has been done. It’s not always fun to clean and run the household. And things definitely slide when I have morning sickness all day long. But when I start my day with prayer, put on a praise CD and am diligent to work around the house there is a surge of joy in my heart. I can meditate on a scripture verse and teach Samuel how to help as he follows me around the house. The Lord strengthens me to do the unfun things and it ends up being a blessing to my family. How cool is that? (Strange how loafing around makes one feel gross and tired, but working energizes you)! I can’t wait until my second trimester begins and I start to feel better, because I have a lot I want to do! My heart is happiest at home.

We recently found out we’re expecting again and are praising the Lord for His kindness towards us. The due date is February 16th!

Psalm 145 (New International Version) A psalm of praise. Of David.

1 I will exalt you, my God the King;
I will praise your name for ever and ever.

2 Every day I will praise you
and extol your name for ever and ever.

3 Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise;
his greatness no one can fathom.

4 One generation will commend your works to another;
they will tell of your mighty acts.

5 They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty,
and I will meditate on your wonderful works.

6 They will tell of the power of your awesome works,
and I will proclaim your great deeds.

7 They will celebrate your abundant goodness
and joyfully sing of your righteousness.

8 The LORD is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and rich in love.

9 The LORD is good to all;
he has compassion on all he has made.

10 All you have made will praise you, O LORD;
your saints will extol you.

11 They will tell of the glory of your kingdom
and speak of your might,

12 so that all men may know of your mighty acts
and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.

13 Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,
and your dominion endures through all generations.
The LORD is faithful to all his promises
and loving toward all he has made.

14 The LORD upholds all those who fall
and lifts up all who are bowed down.

15 The eyes of all look to you,
and you give them their food at the proper time.

16 You open your hand
and satisfy the desires of every living thing.

17 The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and loving toward all he has made.

18 The LORD is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.

19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cry and saves them.

20 The LORD watches over all who love him,
but all the wicked he will destroy.

21 My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD.
Let every creature praise his holy name
for ever and ever!

For the last few weeks I’ve been meditating on what it means to be a Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 woman. I’ve been challenged and encouraged in my role as a wife and mother, as I pray and ask the Lord how I can improve. I’m especially touched at how much work this woman does, and how wise instruction, praise, and kindness is what comes out of her mouth. (Not grudgingly working around the house with bitterness and disdain towards the things that need to be done. Nor is she lazy– laying around, watching too much tv, not preparing anything for her family’s needs, etc). She is content in the role God has given her, and her husband and children praise her. I could talk for so long about all the things I’m absorbing, but I won’t. Instead, I’ll tell you about just one of the things I’ve decided to do.

I’m learning to sew again. My mother taught me how to sew when I was young (thanks mom, what an invaluable skill!) and I took a sewing class in 7th grade. I really enjoyed it, and I thought, you know… this is a great skill to teach my children. How to hem pants, make a quilt, replace a button, or make something for the home or an outfit. But it had been sixteen years, did I remember how? Well, I marched myself on down to the fabric store and bought a pattern for a skirt. I taught myself how to sew in a zipper. I now have two pretty summer skirts, I’m so excited. I’m honing my skills and saving money too. It’s also awesome that my husband encourages me as I try new things.

I had such a blast that I’m diving in deep. I went to the store today and bought enough fabric to make pretty dresses for my friend’s four young daughters, ages 9 through 2. I can hardly wait to get started on them. I hope they turn out well and will be a blessing to the girls. I’m hoping to have little girls of my own someday so I can make them pretty things as well, and teach them how to be a blessing to their families. But until then, maybe I’ll make Samuel some cozy fleece pajamas…